I feel like I’m the only film critic around eagerly anticipating “Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen.” Caught in the questionable spell of Michael Bay’s previous robot-scraping blockbuster adventure for reasons I’m still having trouble articulating, it’s neat to see the franchise jump right back on its metal feet, excreting a colossal sequel in just a hair under two years. Overall, I sincerely loathe Bay and his ego-drenched industry killing ways, but my love for the original toy line and proficient big screen demolition keeps the fires of contempt at a safe distance. I just hope the sequel doesn’t spoil the landmark Bay-Orndorf truce of 2007.
To celebrate the release of “Fallen,” the fine folks at M&M’s have elected to debut a new flavor to help promote the excitement of a fresh “Transformers” motion picture. They call it “Strawberried Peanut Butter,” and if you felt any twinge of hesitation upon reading that name, hold comfort in the fact that I completely agree with you. M&M flavors that wander out of the established caloric comfort zone almost always fail, culminating in a dastardly cherry flavor about two years back that was like eating sugary bits of bathroom tile. Experimentation just isn’t their strong point, and I’ve always been of the mind that the company should stick with what they know. They can fuss with the colors all they like, but the flavors should never stray into uncharted waters. Leave that to those thieving bastards at JBz.
While certain of magnificent flavor failure, the Strawberried Peanut Butter candy surprised me. Actually, it knocked me out.
The base flavor of the candy is the traditional peanut butter filling that’s made M&M’s a hit with candy addicts nationwide, but the addition of a strawberry tang lends the crinkly bag of sweets a faint peanut butter and jelly taste -- not exactly up matching up with the lunchroom classic crust for crust, but packing enough of a nostalgic essence to pass for a good time. The M&M science nerds nailed this flavor with atypical accuracy. Granted, I have no idea how strawberry and peanut butter fit into the Transformer universe (perhaps Optimus Prime has a sweet tooth), but I shouldn’t question the results. When M&M’s find a new flavor that works, it’s best to inch back quietly and perform mental somersaults. Nobody wants another cherry debacle. Or frankly an M&M-overhauled Michael Bay:
The other candy debuting with a Transformers makeover is Snickers, who are rolling out their “Nougabot Bars” in both traditional and mini-sized portions. Billed as the Snickers with “yellow nougat inside,” I can’t imagine what the unusual coloring is supposed to represent. With Bumblebee featured predominately on the front of the packaging, I trust this is harmless homage to everyone’s favorite Autobot and not some sick Snickers semen joke. Sure, it’s crude to even suggest such an offense. However, spend a few minutes sucking down these delicious treats while staring at Bumblebee’s smirking visage and tell me the thought didn’t pass through your mind as well.
So it’s yellow nougat. Because Bumblebee is yellow. Innocent.
There’s no wild taste difference, the coloring is purely cosmetic. A goofy movie tie-in is always welcome around these parts, but the “Nougabot Bars” are only a visual distraction. It’s something of a letdown, especially after experiencing the M&M’s squad pull off a new flavor without the activation of my gag reflex. To help pass the time, the Snickers folk have included a few bits of trivia to help stun your friends with at the next modern art museum fundraiser.
Hey, the Transformers are back and everything points to “Revenge of the Fallen” being as mind-numbingly entertaining and summer-entertainment-ready as the first film, hopefully minus any Autobot urination gags. Fingers crossed.